The USGA says it is a 5 and going down. Other handicaps: procrastination; good food and not playing enough golf.

68 - several years ago. However, the handicap is coming down and I hope to do it again a couple more times this year.

Two: The first was on the 18th at Lost Creek in Austin. It was into the sun and I didn't find it on the green so I looked and there it was in the hole. The guy I had been playing with got called home by his wife when we were on 16 and I had no witness. I told the head pro I had an ace and he asked "Who was your witness?" I replied that " God is my witness." He said "That ain't good enough." I told him "You tell her that!" The second was at the 13th on the Blackjack course at Fair Oaks Ranch Country Club at Fair Oaks Ranch, TX. I was playing by myself and caught up with some friends on the 13th tee box who invited me to join them. I aced that hole and birdied two more coming in.

My Dad, Arnold Palmer, Moe Norman and me.

Driver or three wood or five wood or my long or middle irons or my short irons, wedges or putter. I love them all and talk nice to each and every one of them. I try to spoil them, wash them regularly, change their grips each year and won't let others be rude around them. My golf clubs do what I want them to do a lot better than the kids ever did.

The Pope to discuss a few issues; Jonathon Winters to tell him how much he has made me laugh; Jerry Clower to swap stories with him; Sam Snead to see his sweet swing just one more time.

The 18 hole municipal course in Forest Park, St. Louis, Mo. Lots of big trees, narrow fairways, bent grass greens and water. It wends its way through the grounds of the 1904 World's Fair.

"The Little Red Book" by Harvey Pennick. It is the epitomy of KISS. "The 8 traits of Champion Golfers" by Dr. Deborah Graham and Jon Stabler; "The Elements of Scoring" by Raymond Floyd; and the one my Dad gave me with my first golf club and I have reread many times since 1957 -- Ben Hogan's "Five Lessons The Fundamentals of Golf."

Country Gospel. The Bill Gaither group is terrific: especially Larry Ford, Janet Pascal, Ivan Parker, Jessy Dixon, Guy Penrod, and a few others.

Atlas Shrugged, The Fountainhead, The Virtue of Selfishness (anything written by Ayn Rand.) All books written by Eugene Meehan (my academic mentor.)

The TV western "Purgatory", Tin Cup, Happy Gilmore, Caddyshack, Cat Ballew, and most westerns from the 50's and 60's -- especially if John Wayne is in them.

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I'm just a poor old country boy from St. Louis, Mo who is very happy to be living in Texas, working, and playing golf.

People who know how to have a good time, smile, and try to make others happy.

People who walk in my line, talk while I am hitting, people who don't know the rules or etiquette of golf. People who don't control their temper on the course and resort to cursing every shot, stomping around and, in general, making everyone uncomfortable.

Golf, Golf, Golf, reading, academic research and writing about the middle east, and photography.